So begins a new year of blogging for me.
I've been quite the busy bee so I fear this blog has gathered its share of cobwebs. So updates!
Motherhood
Little Peanut Pie turned out to be a girl. So her dad and I decided to name her Sophie Marie (Cinnamon). The Cinnamon is an unofficial name as her Nana (Caleb's mom) and her Mamina (Caleb's grandmother) both preferred Marie. So Marie she is!
So what's it like? It's like being on a roller coaster. A big chunk of the time, I feel crazy scared. I never really understood the phrase 'big, bad world' until the moment I held her in my arms. And speaking of fear, you don't know what the word means until you're faced with clipping teeny-tiny baby fingernails. I swear I still break out into cold sweat whenever I have to do it. On days when I feel I've hit a good groove, she throws a new thing into the loop. First, it was comfort nursing. Now, it's teething. Sometimes, it's like I'm underwater a lot of the time. Funny thing is, I love being underwater. At least, I'm in my natural element.
I've mostly been at home caring for her and at times, it can be pretty challenging. Long nights that are still disrupted when she has a bad dream. Early wake up calls too since she loves waking up with the dawn. Trying to figure out what she needs when she gets upset. It's not that hard, really. She's very easy to please. Just meet her needs and BAM! She's off flashing her gummy grins at you.
It's like playing Sims with no pause button, really.
Despite it all, I'm punch drunk in love with her. She can be quite the little doofus. She exhibits quite a strong will whenever she decides that she wants to do something. My heart just melts whenever I see father and daughter interacting with each other. She is such a daddy's girl! I don't mind in the least since I was one myself. I'm certainly thankful that my little girl is going to be swamped up to her eyeballs in love and affection.
Both mine and Caleb's families utterly adore her. One of my favorite memories to date would be my dad meeting Sophie for the first time. He wanted everything documented! During the Christmas lunch and dinner, he just hogged her to himself. Most of all, he wanted Sophie to call him with the name I used to call him when I was a little girl: Fudgee.
That tells me that my father loved that name as much as I did. There are no words to describe just how happy that makes me.
As I am Now
I'm a mombie (mom+zombie) mostly. My life revolves around sleeping, working, and caring for Sophie. It's tough but I love every moment of it. My friends visit me often and I really appreciate it. It's nice to know that when I'm unable to go and see my friends, they're more than willing to come to me.
Whenever Sophie sleeps and I have a moment to myself, I often think of my first daughter Magsie. I still mourn in my heart for her but I know she's in a better place. God always has a better plan for us no matter how bleak everything gets.
Anyway! I decided that after such a long hiatus, the blog could use some new things! So I got a little creative and made a new banner and a signature. Do you think it's okay? If any of you would like to know how I made it, feel free to leave a comment and I'll share the process.
So that's it for now!
Much love,
